Know that this realization came to me the same way I have decided to stop smoking almost 6 years ago.
I was standing outside a convenience store on a lunch break. I was a full time graduate student back then, other than photocopied readings and book of communication jargons, coffee and cigarettes were my thing.
As I was enjoying a puff, I realized how people just pass me by, minding their own business, their own struggles and getting on with life like a warrior wearing a camouflage.
Just by people watching, I realized, what the hell am I doing, bored with my life? I decided Im just going to have my last stick as I thought that every puff, nothing really happens to my boring life.
So I quit. Cold Turkey.
I didn’t become a health buff and did spectacular things the very next day but I do remember just carrying on with my life sans the cigarettes and it was fine.
Now with Gossip, and I am not going to be hypocrite, I do love one every now and then. In fact, we have a favorite friend, Chip, who we like to gossip about.
But honestly, when you do it very often and about the same person, it starts to suck the energy out of you. Chip’s been secretly ridiculed and talked about for a very long time.
I’ve seen Chip on an emotional rollercoaster masked with a decent smile and polite manners. Like nothing could really get into Chip.
But when I looked at Chip, Chip seems to be just living life, treading waters, and making most of what is available. Although I do not agree with Chip’s life choices, but I think Chip’s just swinging everything to live. Sure some things were just quite impossible to achieve that Chip just gets on with it and luckily gets away with it.
And we on the sidelines, consume Chip’s story like it was some flavored popcorn. We do enjoy the refill. It was meant to be fun and juicy until I got bored.
I got bored.
Because one day it dawned on me the difference of gossip consumption, gender dynamics, and when we strip all the layers we’ve put on a show, we might be just jealous of this person who had the audacity to risk life choices.
Are we just jealous of this person being brave?
Are we expecting Chip to handle life and be responsible like with our own individual life choices?
Do we wish we are like Chip who gets away with it?
Do we wish we had Chip’s life’s circumstance because if we did we think we’d do better in our own lives?
I think so too.