Tête-à-tête · Wri-therapy

Why I Have Invisible Human Eye Blinders

I have decided two weeks ago that I am going to start wearing my invisible eye blinkers, or what is similar to horse eye blinders.

eyeblinders
Figuratively

I got the idea from the logic of equestrians with horses using eye blinders. This is what it looks like: 800px-horses_2

“Many racehorse trainers believe these keep horses focused on what is in front, encouraging them to pay attention to the race rather than other distractions, such as crowds. Additionally, blinkers are commonly seen on driving horses, to keep them from being distracted or spooked, especially on crowded city streets.”- source 

I, probably like most others (hence the numerous articles written about it) often commit the same adulthood mistake: Comparing yourself to others.

When I read some articles about it, I only thought of material or physical things, but little did I know, I was also committing the same mistake. Not only that, the comparison I am making is internal, therefore it “seaps to your bones“.

And I could not help it. I have the sickness of [getting easily bored] + [free, easy access to social media almost 24/7] +  [social media manager – therefore I really must open social media accounts] = lurking at other people’s profile. And I know we netizens like to fool ourselves and I know early on not to believe everything you see on social media, but come on, you have to admit. Sometimes, it really gets you.

I also know of some fake “living the good life” people, or people whose social media posts seem better but they suck in real life. Sometimes, I get jealous of them too, because they are much or even way better at faking it than me. But then, why fake? That’s when I decided to fuck it, I’ll just wear my invisible blinders and focus on my life. And in order for me to do that, I must have a game plan.

I have slowly drafted a plan.For the past two weeks, I’ve tried my O.M.D. or Operation Moderation Disconnect:

  • I self-implemented a Wifi-off rule for my phone (and all my gadgets) at 10pm. And as long as my family is there, everything else can be dealt with the next morning.
  • I have started getting up early in mornings. Last week, I brisked walked three times. I know it’s not good enough, but it’s better than zero in a week.
  • I’ve started my quiet time. I’ve started reading The Daily Bread in the morning, and again at night. My family thinks I do not like going to church, but the truth is, I like going to church alone. I like my one-on-ones with God. Attending mass or attending mass with them feels like attending a Sunday party, with everyone talking. I never liked big parties.
  • I’ve returned to writing, and this time in my own voice. Have you noticed the frequency of my blog posts lately? Yes, I’ve returned to my therapy.
  • I’ve tied my happiness to my goals. I have cut down my procrastination time in half. Paying my bills on time, running my own errands, accomplishing my tasks and my other mini projects, and crossing things off my check list brings me happiness. I feel like an accomplished adult.

So far, I am happy to report that it is working. However, It’s only been a couple of weeks. No drastic results yet but what’s important is I’m doing something about it.

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